Make A Space For Me

When I was little

I decided

it was not safe

to be me


so I hid.


I hid the cry

of my confusion

just behind my twinkling eyes.

I hid the shake

of my uncertain

deep below my growing thighs

to a place

no one could tell

just what it was I truly

felt.


I was clever!

I was magic!

I used anything it took

to forget what I was feeling -

I used every trick and hook.


I used food

I used the screen

Mickey Mouse, Beyoncé... Jeez!

All my life the USA

filled me with it's shiny dreams


I used my flesh

bone-chilled

beneath the bodies of brown boys,

I used the suck of burning

grass to the highest and the low.

Then I used liquor sweet and bitter

every day into the next:

it worked so well I came to like the numb of wine so much

the best!


Till some thing happened...


... the forgetting

went beyond my childhood pain.


After a lifetime of forgetting

I forgot how I was made.


I forgot

the things I liked,

I forgot

the things I wanted,

I forgot the little girl

who'd made a plan for my survival


I forgot

Me.


For I had begun to be

whomever

others wished

to see...


Until one day

I heard a voice

from somewhere old

from somewhere deep.


A tiny voice

which whispered sweetly

"Don't forget.

Re-member Me.


In your joy and in your tears

in your comfort; your despair

when you've fallen on your knees

don't forget that I am Here.


See

I am the one who watches

See

I am the one who sings

See

I am the one who powers

your desires; EVERY need


It is I who shall break free

the tallest truths you dare not speak.

It is I who shall make real

the fearless hopes you dare not dream.


And I ask; now that you hear me

And I ask; now that you've seen


that you hold me in your heart...


That you make

a space for me."


- The One Who Sings

photo by Antonia Steyn




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